Easier To Go Out?

At the end of the day (especially at the end of the weekend) I am so tired that sometimes I succumb to my exhaustion and suggest to Dan that we go out for dinner. After all, it will be easier. Tonight we went to Red Mill for burgers. It was not easier.

We were met with a long line when we arrived. And since this is the type of place where you stand in line to order and then find a seat, I was not pleased with our situation. Waiting (for anything) is not Kelan and Lauren's strong suit. I decide to do the unpopular thing and sit down in the last available booth with the kids while Dan stood in line. I purposely did not meet anyone's gaze/glare who was ahead of us, but I could feel their disdain. Karma will get me later, but for now I needed a place to park the kids.

Kelan insisted on helping Dan place our order - which translates into him running laps between our table and Dan. Meanwhile I am trying to contain Lauren who is frantically grabbing the salt shaker, and the ketchup and mustard squirt bottles. After Dan and Kelan order, they return to the table with the highchair for Lauren and several waters. Soon to be one water. Lauren grabs her cup and trying to head off a wet end result, I attempt to retrieve the water only to have her squeeze the life out of the paper cup forcing water over the table. A minute later, Kelan has accidentally knocked over his water on the table. We have used tons of napkins during this outing, and we have not even started eating yet.

We are still waiting for our food. Lauren is occupying herself by licking the table (I am now somewhat thankful for the table cleaning earlier with all the spilt water and napkins). Kelan is trying to excuse himself from the table to get forks and knives in preparation for our meal. Dan remains stoic throughout this ordeal, whereas I have to state out loud that I need to take a deep breath and calm down. Why haven't they called our name? I am hungry and the kids are getting progressively worse.

Dan! At last - they call our name. Dinner...is ready. A sense of calm descends on our table. Food. That is what the kids needed. That, and a whole lot of ketchup. We gave Lauren a quarter of Kelan's hamburger and not only did is seem to last for the entire meal, but she managed to put more ketchup on that one little piece (not forgetting her face and the table) than I used on my whole burger and fries. But at this point, I do not care. Knock yourself out - ketchup can be a food group tonight.

Like most kids, once you have finished eating, anything left is now a toy. Lauren has one final burger bite on her fork that she is gliding through ketchup that is covering her portion of the table. What you are telling me, Lauren, is that you are done with your dinner. We take away her food and then she sees Dan's water glass. Her next object of affection. Of course one look at her face/hands covered with ketchup and burger and you just know you do not want to share your water glass. Dan and I tag team her with baby wipes, give her a sip of water and declare dinner is over.

Kelan has been surprisingly calm and patient throughout - I think he was hungry (although he did have pancakes this morning, an early lunch, Chinese takeout leftovers for a snack and now a burger and fries. I do not know where he puts is all). We quickly put on coats and bus our table (there has been a steady line of people waiting to order since we arrived and now a new family is eyeing our table as we prepare to leave...). We make it outside and head for the car. I am now trying to remember why it was supposed to be easier to go out?